Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
