dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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