Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize
