Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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