For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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