we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
