So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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