Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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