i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
