If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Text me some of your sweat
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
