I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Randomize
