When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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