I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
