Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize