; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
