I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
