Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  dude. I'm so drunk.

  (972): View more from Texas

  pete, this is bryce's mom

  (214): View more from Texas

  I can't wait to have my cock in your ass

  (972): View more from Texas

  pete, this is still bryce's mom

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  (214): dude. I'm so drunk. (972): pete, this is bryce's mom (214): I can't wait to have my cock in your ass (972): pete, this is still bryce's mom http://tfl.nu/lat0
  Replies (180) Good night (37344) Bad night (5421)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  Barsexuality is the new black.

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  (718): Barsexuality is the new black. http://tfl.nu/lc2j
  Replies (7) Good night (2622) Bad night (655)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.

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  (703): Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon. http://tfl.nu/bjrm
  Replies (12) Good night (5193) Bad night (1166)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  i think i scared a bird with my dick

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  (832): i think i scared a bird with my dick http://tfl.nu/1tdx
  Replies (20) Good night (4640) Bad night (1193)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.

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  (517): the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into. http://tfl.nu/bckk
  Replies (14) Good night (3016) Bad night (1862)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life

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  (860): I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life http://tfl.nu/l4zk
  Replies (37) Good night (6167) Bad night (1353)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do

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  (315): I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do http://tfl.nu/m83n
  Replies (30) Good night (3491) Bad night (1702)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.

  (1-702): View more from Nevada

  True on all accounts.

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  (702): I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me. (1-702): True on all accounts. http://tfl.nu/tt9s
  Replies (13) Good night (3578) Bad night (1059)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day

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  (774): Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day http://tfl.nu/bsus
  Replies (4) Good night (1514) Bad night (803)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.

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  (508): Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess. http://tfl.nu/kvya
  Replies (7) Good night (1806) Bad night (568)
• Favorite

  (928): View more from Arizona

  Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.

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  (928): Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week. http://tfl.nu/3dmv
  Replies (6) Good night (1530) Bad night (431)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time

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  (803): Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time http://tfl.nu/n1yf
  Replies (2) Good night (571) Bad night (358)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.

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  (504): I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina. http://tfl.nu/2cbm
  Replies (1) Good night (506) Bad night (298)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.

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  (541): He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes. http://tfl.nu/w3c8
  Replies (1) Good night (312) Bad night (838)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner

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  (281): Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner http://tfl.nu/2e25
  Replies (3) Good night (259) Bad night (604)

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