I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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