he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
he just fucked me for my cheese.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Randomize