Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I show you my penis last night?
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize