the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
