i jhust puked up my retainher.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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