they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
