.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Randomize
