Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
