Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did