Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
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