Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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