why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
