Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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