I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
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I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
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