what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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