Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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