I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
