Quick, to the slutcave!
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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