You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
