i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Dignity is for republicans.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize