you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
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I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
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We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
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