You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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