it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
