Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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