Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
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