best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
