You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize