I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
