Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
