like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I am one with the molecules
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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