Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
