My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
