I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
