a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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